Back To The Sludge

Two days after returning from holiday I am back to sitting on my arse. The holiday was fun and strenuous in that a lot of trekking was involved. It was good to catch up with a couple of friends I haven’t seen in ages in San Francisco, exploring Lake Tahoe and revisiting Grand Canyon and Las Vegas. And naturally I took a lot of photographs. Four hundred of them.

During the previous three weeks I’d learned I was developing an undesirable loathing of Mainlanders in general, a spurt magnified by my being in SF surrounded by a high volume of Cantonese speaking locals. My untidy and messy Mainlander flatmate had moved out prior to my holiday which was a huge relief.   

I will try to sort out the pics as soon as I can and post them. I have a shoot lined up this weekend to practise my portraiture skills, and I’d entered four photos for a portrait competition in a national photographic magazine. Wish me luck!

All Set

I’m all packed and will head off to the airport in about an hour. Looking forward to catching up with a couple of friends.

See you all when I return!

Waterstones

I’d attended a World Press Photo Exhibition a few days ago at the Royal Festival Hall and this odd collection of artwork was planted outside.  

Stroding further along the South Bank, I’d spotted this kid practising his somersalts. It was a good way to test out the five frames per second feature on my camera.

Be Politically Correct With Women

She is not a BLEACHED BLONDE – She is PEROXIDE DEPENDENT.

She is not a BAD COOK – She is MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE.

She does not wear TOO MUCH JEWELRY – She is METALLICALLY OVERBURDENED.

She is not CONCEITED – She is INTIMATELY AWARE OF HER BEST QUALITIES.

She does not want to be MARRIED – She wants to lock you in DOMESTIC INCARCERATION.

She does not GAIN WEIGHT – She is a METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER.

She does not TEASE or FLIRT – She engages in ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION.

She is not DUMB – She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.

She is not TOO SKINNY – She is SKELETALLY PROMINENT.

She does not HAVE A MUSTACHE – She is IN TOUCH WITH HER MASCULINE SIDE

She does not HATE TELEVISED SPORTS – She is ATHLETICALLY IGNORANT.

She has not BEEN AROUND – She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.

She does not WEAR TOO MUCH PERFUME – She commits FRAGRANCE ABUSE.

She does not GO SHOPPING – She is MALL FLUENT.

She is not an AIR HEAD – She is REALITY IMPAIRED.

She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY – She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.

She does not get FAT or CHUBBY – She achieves MAXIMUM DENSITY.

She is not COLD or FRIGID – She is THERMALLY INACCESSIBLE.

She does not WEAR TOO MUCH MAKEUP – She has reached COSMETIC SATURATION.

She does not NAG YOU – She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE. 

Evolution Of The Businessman

The Week That Was

The Smell of Warmth

After the rainiest summer the UK has ever experienced in ages, with parts of the country submerged, some rays of sunshine descended onto London recently. Unfortunately, travelling on the Tube is a nightmare with sweltering heat baking passengers in the tunnels. Because the tunnels were built over 100 years ago, the design of the trains meant no air conditioning could be incorporated. But that’s not the worst part. No, the worst part is being stuck in a packed carriage with certain passengers who never heard of the concept of washing, either themselves or their clothes, nor employing the use of a spray called deodorant. 

Nikon D300 & D3

Only weeks after purchasing the D200, Nikon announced the release of two DSLRs in November: the D300 and their first full frame digital camera, the D3. I had been anticipating the successor to the D200 as prices had been rapidly falling which was why I’d bought one. The differences between the two are minimal with the D300 featuring anti-dust shake, a CMOS sensor and a 3 inch high definition LCD screen. The body only D300 cost almost double what I had paid for my D200 body so I am quite pleased I had purchased it when I did.

It is my intention to keep the D200 for at least two years and then I might cast my eye on the D3. She’s certainly a beauty.

Californication 

After spreading the addiction of Dexter to a lot of my colleagues, it is now my mission to hook them onto Californication. This new adult comedy drama starring David Duchovny definitely isn’t for prudes and the conservative types.

Duchovny is best remembered for his role as Agent Mulder on X-Files but a lot of people forget that he is also an excellent comedic actor. I’d first witnessed this talent during the early years of X-Files when he’d appeared on The Larry Sanders Show lampooning himself. Californication is the ideal vehicle for Duchovny to showcase his comedic range in his portrayal of Hank Moody, a cynical, lascivious, and sardonic writer suffering from writer’s block.   

Exiled

A modern western Hong Kong style courtesy of director Johnny To. A noodle western if you will. Most of the cinema output that emanates from HK tend to be mediocre at best but there are a few gems to be found, and this is one of them. It’s not a new film and it can be caught on DVD.

The backdrop of Macau serves as an ideal location with its Portuguese architecture providing a vintage tone reminiscent of the Spaghetti westerns’ Spanish settings. The slick and balletic gunplay action is a homage to John Woo harking back to the days of A Better Tomorrow and The Killer.

Another good HK film is Protege for those who enjoy undercover cop thrillers.

The film also delves into the economics of drug trafficking.

Lust, Caution

Ang Lee’s new film following the success of Brokeback Mountain and a return to Lee’s Taiwan for this production. It’s one film I’m looking forward to after a summer of big budget and mostly drab blockbusters.

Set during the Japanese occupation of Shanghai, newcomer Tang Wei embarks on an illicit affair with Tony Leung in order to trap him and have him killed. View the trailer here

Sorted

The holiday is all sorted out at long last. Accommodation is all booked as are: flight to the US, flight from San Francisco to Las Vegas, car rental to Lake Tahoe and Grand Canyon. Now I’m just counting the days. Any xagans fancy meeting up for a coffee in SF?

Happy 800th Birthday

Tuesday, 28th August marked the 800th birthday of my hometown of Liverpool. Unfortunately, I couldn’t make it back to the city to join in the celebrations but I wish it all the best.

Pic sourced from the BBC

And finally congratulations to a friend’s recent announcement that she’s going to have a baby. That means that everyone I know who has been married for over twelve months has had at least one baby. With the exception of the arseho. I wonder if it is because his wife doesn’t want to have kids with him as she knows they will turn out to be complete losers just like him. Besides, he will make a bad parent anyway and I’m not alone in that assessment.   

Be Politically Correct With Men

He does not have a FAT BEER GUT – He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.

He is not a CRAP DANCER – He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.

He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME – He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.

He does not SLEEP AROUND – He is HORIZONTALLY OVER-GENEROUS.

He is not BALDING – He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.

He is not a CRADLE SNATCHER – He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS.

He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK – He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.

He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG – He is a SWINE EMPATHIZING BIGOT.

He is not afraid of COMMITMENT – He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED.

He does not STINK – He has HYGIENE AVERSION SYNDROME.

He is not a GROPING PERVERT – He suffers from COMPULSIVE HAND MOVEMENT DISORDER.

He is not OBSESSED WITH TELEVISED SPORTS – He has AN ATHLETIC TELEVISUAL ADDICTION.

He does not IGNORE YOU – He has ATTENTION SPAN DEFICIT DISORDER.

He is not a LAZY, MESSY SLOB – He LACKS HAND-VACUUM COORDINATION.

He does not tell ENDLESS, BORING, UNFUNNY JOKES – He is HUMORLY OVER-CONFIDENT.

He does not act like a TOTAL ASS – He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.

The Return

Returning to xanga is like seeing an old friend. It’s like nothing has changed. Except losing a couple more subscribers.

My time during the last few days were preoccupied by work, organising my trip with friends, work, arranging alternative travel plans if the trip didn’t materialise, work, searching and tracking lenses and filters on eBay to compliment my Nikon, work, selecting a dream team for the fantasy football league and creating one for my department to participate, work, and hoping the sub-prime market collapse in the US will precipitate a property crash in the UK. Did I mention work?

The trip to San Francisco next month will be supplemented by trips to Lake Tahoe, Grand Canyon and Las Vegas. I was supposed to return to SF and Los Angeles last year as my previous visits were back in 1996 and 1986 respectively but better late than never. My research for alternative travel plans resulted in destinations for my trips next year: Canada, Mexico and Cuba. Of course, things can change. Everything for this forthcoming holiday is almost finalised and it is culminating to be the most expensive trip I have embarked on so far.

The cost stems from the fact that in North America, double, triple, quadruple rooms are all the same – two queen or king size beds in the room. The problem arises when three guys do not want to share a bed. We have done so before in the past but not on holiday. For our trip to New York last year I’d solved the problem by finding an apartment to rent. This time the apartments on offer were unsuitable so I’d searched for one and two bedroom suites that tended to be more upscale.  

And some people wondered why I haven’t been out for ages. This is why! I’d been leading a boring and languid life saving my money for the new camera gear and for the holiday. Perhaps it’s a good thing I’m not dating anyone at the moment. As a colleague remarked, it’s better to spend the money on myself than waste it on someone else on a meaningless date as London is so expensive.

Observations At Work

Pics taken with my camera phone

A new business strategy? Or another measure of innovative cost-cutting?

Some people just can’t read…

…still dumping paper into a bin for recycling tapes.

Deadly Fruit

One day in the forest, 3 guys were just hiking along a trail when all of a sudden, a huge pack of indians attaked them and knocked them out.

When they woke up, they were at the leader of the tribe’s throne.

The chief then said, “All of your lives may be spared if you can find ten of one fruit and bring them back to me.”

So after a while the first man returned with 10 apples. The cheif then ordered him to stick all ten of them up his butt without making any expression at all on his face. He had a little bit of trouble with the first one and started crying while trying to put the next one in. He was soon killed.

Later, the next guy came in with 10 grapes. The cheif soon ordered him to do the same as the first guy. After to the 9th grape, the man started laughing so hard for no apperant reason, and was killed.

The first two guys soon met in heaven and the first guy ask the second, “Why did you start laughing? You only needed one more grape and you’d have gotten away!”

The second guy answered while still laughing, “I couldn’t help it. I saw the third guy walking in with pineapples.”

Boo!

Hiatus

I’m back on xanga after two weeks of enforced absence precipitated by a lousy functioning PC. I didn’t miss blogging at all. It has been fairly quiet on here for the past couple of years with the writers I regularly read either stopped blogging temporarily or closed their accounts. With my fourth xangaversary passing a couple of weeks ago, I thought about the amount of xangans I have met since that time and those I have become friends with. It is quite remarkable.

My blogging output has been on a diminishing curve for the past few months and I fear I am losing the drive to write. A friend commented I wrote a lot when I was living in Amsterdam so I guess a fair chunk of it can be attributed to ranting about general life in Holland.  

So what has been happening? The past few weeks were spent catching up with friends I haven’t seen in weeks, months and years. The one I haven’t seen in weeks handed me an invite to her forthcoming wedding in October. The one I haven’t seen in months engaged in a discussion about photography and directed me to a photogenic girl who could possibly model for me. It’s all very well shooting your friends but to truly capture the spirit of your creativity, it’s doubly important to shoot someone photogenic. We discussed about hiring a studio for a couple of hours to just shoot and experiment. The one I haven’t seen in years – six to be precise - took me to dinner in East London. During the interval years she’d moved to New York, married, divorced, moved to Toronto, married for the second time, returned to London and had a baby. I got to met her Canadian husband who showed me the area adjacent to the City. It had been years since my last visit to the area and it has transformed into something resembling Greenwich Village in New York. I plan to return to take some shots in the near future.

After a frustrating week dealing with a power seller on eBay, my new Nikkor 18-200mm VR lens finally arrived yesterday. The task can now begin to gain experience with my new Nikon D200 camera before embarking on my next trip. The D200 is a monster of a camera with a huge amount of functions to master…and I’d only read half of the manual! For those asking in a previous post – I will be selling my Sony Alpha A100, three lenses, and filters, probably on eBay. Photography is an expensive hobby. I still have two more lenses to acquire and hopefully the sale of the Sony gear will offset the cost of the Nikon equipment by half.

Asian Trip: Hong Kong

Saturday 6th – Tuesday 9th May 2007

It was an interesting trip to China and it was back to the usual port of call – Hong Kong. The days remaining were spent with friends and catching up.

I took the opportunity to shoot a couple of friends’ kids. This is Michaela.

Michaela and dotting dad.

Sienna

Fairly amusing sign

On the Monday, I’d took the ferry to Cheung Chau Island to do some exploring.

Alas, the oppressive heat was overbearing and the walking exploration was abandoned for another time.

Will I leave my heart here next month?

I’ll be sure to wear some flowers in my hair when I’m there. 

Pic sourced from the internet

(For those who don’t know, it’s a reference to the classic oldie song I Left My Heart In San Francisco sung by Tony Bennett, and San Francisco (Be Sure To Wear Some Flowers In Your Hair) sung by Scott McKenzie)

Naughty

A little boy came down for breakfast one morning and asked his grandma, “Where’s mom and dad?” and she replied, “They’re up in bed.”

The little boy started to giggle and ate his breakfast and went out to play. Then he returned for lunch and asked his grandma, “Where’s mom and dad?” and she replied “They’re still up in bed.”

Again the little boy started to giggle and ate his lunch and went out to play. Then he returned for dinner and once again asked his grandma, “Where’s mom and dad?” and she replied “They’re still up in bed.”

The little boy started to laugh and his grandmother asked, “What gives? Everytime I tell you they’re still up in bed you start to laugh! What’s going on here?”

The little boy replied, “Well, last night daddy came into my bedroom and asked me for the Vaseline and I gave him super glue instead.”

This PC I’m stuck with for the rest of the week at work sucks big time. It’s slow, crashes occasionally, and the internet connection doesn’t function properly. Our IT Support is located in New York and are generally useless. I tend to blog at work during my breaks as I don’t have time otherwise.

For your perusal some video clips I’d recorded from my last day in Lijiang Old Town. One weak aspect of my mobile phone is the poor quality of the video recording.

Time To Move On

We had a wonderful relationship, you and I. The memories will stay imprinted in my mind for as long as I live. We’d travelled to faraway places together, shared magnificent views, and enjoyed glorious sunsets in exotic locations. How can I forget the first destination I took you to – New York, my favourite city in the whole world – where I’d lavished you with gifts: a Sigma lens, a Manfrotto tripod, Tiffen filters and that timeless accessory, a Lowepro bag. We’d experienced it all – hot, cold, sand and snow. But it is time for me to move on.

You have to understand, it’s not you, it’s me. I know, it’s so cliché but in this instance it’s true. I feel there is room for more growth within me. You’d taught me alot and I will always be grateful but I have found another, one that’s slightly older than you but whose sophistication is quite high. It is just what I need to take me to the next level. I don’t mean to degrade you by that. You’re far better than alot of others in your class. So with that, I bid you farewell and good luck.  

Adios Sony Alpha A100 

Hello there Nikon D200

For those wondering, this was written with tongue firmly in cheek.

Asian Trip: Lijiang, China

Friday 5th May 2007

My final day in Lijiang was to be one for relaxation. Days of arduous trekking had rendered my legs to latent jelly. Still, I’d managed to conjure up some strength to trudge to the Black Dragon Pond Park, another attraction of Lijiang.

Upon arrival, one is greeted by the sight of palm painting

More info

Peacocks for hire for photographic sessions

Black Dragon Pond

Closer view

Gallery of padlocks

For a nominal fee you can inscribe a message

A few locals actually inhabit the Park, such as this woman washing her vegetables.

This is only a guess but I reckon that statue is of someone important from China’s history

Yep, he looks important alright

This I had to check out…

…not particularly impressive

There is also a trail up the hills leading to a panoramic view of Jade Dragon Snow Mountain. Crucially, there is a sign warning potential ramblers to go in groups of no less than four as strangers sometimes wander in to commit robbery. There wasn’t any need for me to go as I already have ample photographs of the Mountain so I’d headed back to the Old Town.  

Cooking up some sort of pancake

The Old Town

A novel way of carrying and shielding your kid from the sun

As long as the kid doesn’t suffocate

Weaving silk

“Oh no, I forgot to spray deodorant!”

Naxi locals dancing to a traditional tune

Tourists joining in

She seems quite bored by it all

Who you lookin’ at? Er, you?

Naxi performing on stage

Just what did he kill to wear on his head?

Naxi dessert. By the time I got round to trying one, they were all sold out.

That was one robe I would have liked to have tried on…

Someone clearly bored by her job

A wide variety of meat on offer for barbecuing

Mmmm…

I went to try a selection of tea and purchased quite a few boxes to take back home. I took some to work and my colleagues were particularly impressed by the various flavours, especially our former receptionist.  

The next day I had to wake up early to catch a connecting flight in Kunming to return to Hong Kong. My first venture to the Motherland was interesting but if I am to return I will learn some Mandarin first.
 

 

My punishing busy schedule is starting to take a toll on me.

Will take it easy in September…